Rachel from Accounts is rumoured to be considering life changing cosmetic surgery to embed a cassette tape into her ample forehead. This will allow her to insert a pencil into the cogs and rewind any ridiculous decisions she has made in the past.
Although deemed roomy enough to accommodate a video tape rather than the chosen, smaller audio tape, the Chancellor couldn’t decide on VHS or Betamax due to the sheer amount of logic involved in the decision and thus settled to reuse a tape from her teenage years, Einstein a Go Go by Landscape.
‘C90 is a good choice I believe, more reliable than C120 and still able to more than hold most of my bullshit, economy wrecking decisions’ said the Turing prodigy.
As a Senior member of the cabinet, she will still require permission from the PM before undergoing such a critical procedure but he was currently out getting fitted for a free suit.
A cabinet source stated that if the procedure is successful then it may be rolled out to other Labour MP’s, dependent on their ability to use a pencil.
